The beat that my heart skipped

It's clearly NOT

I'm tired of pretending everything is cool. It's just so much easier not to care! (and I guess that's why you don't)

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Nov 13 playlist

Yeah, I said it!

FUCK doing hatch mark in Illustrator.

the things I have loved I am allowed to keep

some of my favorite things make me sad, but they are still my favorite things.

fool me once, shame on you..

This is the 2nd time that I have felt this way and this time I have no one but myself to blame. It's embarrassing. I forgave the first offense because I thought the apologies and feelings were sincere, but now I find myself questioning that. To be honest the thing that hurts me most is just the feeling that he didn't give a shit about how I feel. I mean, I was really hopeful to do all the things we planned to do together, but what seems to disappoint me most is the feeling of distrust/betrayal. I trusted him to act with my feelings in mind, I suppose. Like the first time he did wrong he came forward to me. Instead he has been griping about me to people with big mouths. So it gets around to me and I think "wow, all those things I did and all the things he said meant nothing" all because he went around my back. It would have hurt so much less if he just told me he thought things weren't going to work out. At least then I wouldn't have felt so betrayed. Now I find it hard to face certain people and I feel like I have no one to talk to about how I am feeling. The last thing I want is to come off as if I just want to portray him in the worst way possible. I really don't want to do that. I'm just really upset and hurt, but I don't honestly think he's a bad person. I just think he's confused, has some shit to figure out and has made some seriously poor judgment calls. We all do and I have just been made an example of that... I made a bad judgment call, let myself get ahead of..well..myself. I leaped before I looked. Shame on me.

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Alice in Blunderland

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Greater than uggo

Yeah, I dunno really. Lol New inks. Faber-Castell.







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TrivTex doodles

A Triv inspired doodle. I kinda tried to mimic his style but mine sucks. I also gave up and didn't finish that top corner. "fuck it."








Here's the part I'd just drawn originally before adding all the designs around it.





And here's something he drew for me. I'm so jealous...

Some random stuff

Some character designs (kinda) for a webcomic in the works.




CAPTAIN WOLF!





The following 4 are all part of my 99 robots project that I never actually completed... I'm in the process of completing it now a bit more seriously...




Here's a sketch of my ex from Scotland, Steven.


A creepy fox skull...

My Aion character... yep, I play video games including MMOs. I'm a dork...


This is a cartoon of me painting Steven's arse blue... (Scot's joke)


This is a cover for a photo album I designed for a friend's b-day gift. It's done in Illustrator and Photoshop

Badger, Badger...

Cryin' in my birthday cake
I think about the steps to take
But I just don't know what to do
When we met you called me Tex
And sang me songs about your ex
Now I think I really like you

Then he said this ride's too fast
If we keep this up we'll crash
I'll see you when I get back to Austin







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FML

I'm seriously the worst person I know. Just call me Major Fuckup.

FML running sideways

I'm up way too early. I feel out of sorts. Not exactly happy, but not sad or depressed or anything either. Just 'meh.' I guess with my birthday being nearly ruined and this trip to Tulsa in 4 hours I've got a lot on my mind. I have decisions I should make that in all honesty I just don't want to make. I guess I'll have a week 1/2 to think about it... or not! I don't really know what to expect when I get to Tulsa anyway. Maybe I won't even have the time to think about it? That would be nice... This could be like walking away from small car wreck and directly into a burning building though. I know that I should be very careful with what I do while I'm away. And you know actions speak much louder, clearer, stronger then words. If I fuck up "I'm sorry" ain't going to cut it. Fuck. Now I'm thinking about it and I really just don't know what to do.

Happy birthday

"and they were only words and I never meant them"



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blaaaargh!

lol crazy, random title GO! :P

Sorry, no pictures this time. I'm a bit uninspired so I'll just write a little something.

I'm still having trouble with sleeping. I didn't sleep at all yet so I'm going to take a sleeping pill after this post. Most folks already know that I've been having problems with sleep for a few months now. I just hope I'm not a freakin' zombie at dinner or the party tomorrow...

OH YES!

Tomorrow is my 25th b-day. My mom was a total sweetie and bought me this awesome dress to wear. It's soooo sexy... lol I'm very excited to show it off.

Oh, okay, I lied. Here's a picture. It's a photo, not a drawing though!


THIS is my new den/art studio. It's finally finished! For those who don't know we converted the garage into a room. You can't see them in this photo, but I also have my drawing desk and a full size fridge in this room! It's like a man cave, but I'm a woman... ha ha! I call it the fox den... Get it?

Ugh, fuck... The lack of sleep has seriously affected my mood and my ability to think clearly. I'm going to get some rest (hopefully) before I say or do something out of character.

I'll be your Ramona Flowers if you'll be my Scott Pilgrim

TrivTex

RAINBOW!

I <3 RAINBOWS

Okay, so... karaoke tonight? FRIENDS FUCKIN' BAILED except ANDY. ANDY is the MAN.
Oh, and Triv, Rainbow and Teh were there... W00T!

Mak vs Wolf in the battle of the beards!!

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Geeks who drink

Some photos of team venture at geeks who drink!

Me and domo!!!


Wolf and domo!


Me Jason and Sexy Rachel


Andy and I!


Wolf and Jules lookin cute :)


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Location:Agora Pkwy,San Antonio,United States

RAINBOWS!!!

Ever played Peggle? That game is crack. I'm pretty sure we just spent 4 hours playing it tonight. It's puzzle game CRACK. Gotta have it!

Also chatroulette, it's everything they say it is: FUCKING weird. However, I have been introduced to a fun little prank that I'm calling the whispering eye. You see what I'm getting at here! Okay so it's a little perverted, but hey, this is chatroulette! 1 out of 3 people you "chat" with is just some dude waxing his pole.. Anyway the prank is a little hard to pull off at first, but what you do is you shut your eye real tight and hold the webcam up to it sideways so that it's resembles a vagina! If your lucky enough to have a webcam with a focus I recommend making it a little blurry. The fun part is watching people react. Once they start to freak out over the supposed vag shot slowly open your eye... Trust me, if you're really bored this at least a good 30 mins or more of entertainment.

Anyway, here's some sketches. I'll actually be working on some paintings tomorrow so I'll try to have photos of those up soon too so you don't get bored with crappy iPhone photos of black and white sketches...

Just a little something I drew for my friend, Mat, obviously. He's a hell-a fun guy to hang out with and he likes my art so naturally I had to draw him somethin'.

Cali's new hobbies: hanging out in the fireplace and pooping in my shower... Luckily she does her business by or in the drain. She must think it's like the toilet and that the magic water is gonna make her crap disappear. Maybe I should try to train her how to use the actual toilet like all those other weird cats. I don't know why she's been chillin' in the fireplace though. Good thing we've got the slew closed.

Every Damn Night

Working, kinda.

First Purple Haze design...


BETTER...


And for consistency... Blah!


Ugh... so tired. Need to stop taking photos with iPhone. funky color...

Dead Fish Don't Swim

coffee. movies. pandora radio. too much time on facebook. texting matt.

slow day.
not much happened.
remembering good times...

Currently my cat is trying to invade my lap. She's been doing this all day. Anyone who sits or lays down she climbs onto. I don't typically mind, but she is being very clingy today. I did let her cuddle me while I watched Percy Jackson followed by the Invention of Lying. Now she sits on the chair next to me, staring... always staring, silently judging... Other then that my day has been uneventful.

I would also like to share the some music I'm listening to.
3rd Planet by Modest Mouse:

We all make mistakes. Luckily for me I've learned from mine!